Walking Beside Them: Parents as Sexual Health Guides for Young Adults with Disabilities
As parents, we serve as a dedicated support network for our children with disabilities throughout their lives. This role can amplify the weight and stress of typical developmental milestones that all children face. We model behaviors and set standards that extend well beyond their high school years.
During the high school years and beyond, parents often become the primary resource for young adults with disabilities, seeking guidance on healthy relationships and sexual health information. We have the opportunity to model and support safe behaviors both online and offline, in friendships and romantic relationships.
It’s crucial not to shy away from difficult conversations about relationships and sexual health. By sticking to factual information, we can effectively support our children during this pivotal time. When they recognize us as trustworthy and reliable sources, they are more likely to return for guidance again and again.
How to Be the Sexual Health Guide for Your Young Adult with Disabilities
- Create a Safe Environment
- Be Open, Honest, and Non-Judgmental
- Listen Actively
- Educate Yourself
- Use Age-Appropriate Language
- Encourage Questions
- Be Patient
- Discuss Consent and Boundaries
- Model Healthy Relationships
- Involve Professionals if Needed
Reflecting on your own childhood, you may recall times when discussing sexual health felt uncomfortable or lacked openness. Perhaps some messages you received did not promote a nonjudgmental atmosphere, or certain topics were not taught using accurate information. These experiences can complicate conversations around sexual health.
It’s perfectly acceptable to tell your young adult, “I’m not sure, but I’ll find the answers for you.” While we may not have all the answers, we know how to be present for them when they need us most. If you feel you’re navigating uncharted territory, remember: you are actively working to improve your young adult’s understanding and experience in this important area.
Topics to cover for young adults ages 16+
- Consent & Communication
- Talk with your young adult about the legal considerations of consent.
- Teach consent using the F.R.I.E.S. model
- Safe Practices
- Define what “safe sex” is, and how contraception and protection play a role.
- Emphasize that regular health screenings are needed for their bodies, and the types of exams they will need.
- Healthy Relationships
- The importance of emotional intelligence for healthy relationships.
- Knowing the warning signs of unhealthy relationships and dating violence.
Resources for talking with your young adult with disabilities about sexual health
-
- When you need a Healthy Relationships and Sexual Health class, TETONS from The Utah Parent Center is here.
- Real-Talk, How should your family or support staff talk to you about sex?
- Adult self-advocates talk about what they want in a conversation about sex
- https://youtu.be/2BxOtJqRpnU
- Real-Talk, Did your parents talk to you about sex?
- Adult self-advocates talk about their experience learning about sex
- https://youtu.be/zb7Pj0cBWyw
- Parenting Tips: A tool for talking
- Sex education: Talking with your teen about sex by the Mayo Clinic
